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my tumblr site

This is something I have recently found, and I update it a lot more. If you want to find out my daily interests, random thoughts or whatever you can follow me on Tumblr. Its the best thing I've found:)

Mistakes

This whole humbling theme seems to be continuing.
Had a mini break down during deliveries today, I ended up switching around two orders so each person got the other persons food. It stressed me out. I was runnning…well driving like a mad person, but I think thoughts in my head were driving crazyer.


“rachel what were you thinking”

“Rachel you are SO stupid”

“Rachel how could you let this happen.”

“oh my gosh everyone is going to be sooo mad.”

“I’ll just tell my boss i’ll buy the boxes of sandwiches.”

“i hope I dont get fired.”

“Woah A COP, better slow down”

“GAHHH WHY? HOW? I EVEN CHECKED THE BOXES WHEN I GAVE THEM.”

“How could I let that happen?”


As I drove back to the Potbelly store from the 2nd try at getting the food right, I had a revelation. I was praying for my friend and then all of a sudden I broke down in tears and it was like He said, “beloved, YOU are the one who needs me right now, YOU are the one who can’t admit she is not ok.” Then that verse came to my head, Come to me all who are weary and HEAVY LADEN, and I w i l l give you rest.

Through making this one mistake on a delivery I realized how hard it is for me to make mistakes. Then I started thinking deeper and wondered, “why is it so hard for me to admit I did something wrong.” Its because I carry pride, I put this wall up that says, EVERYTHING IS WONDERFUL, I’M PEACHY KEEN (ha sorry one of my co workers always says that.) but in reality I’m not the greatest.  So in that car ride I thanked God for giving me another reminder to get off my stool, and come back down to the bottom. He reminded me that its OK to get help, or to even ask for help.

God I pray that you continue to soften my heart, continue to break down the walls I have built up and let me accept when help comes my way. I want to find all my satisfaction in you and you alone. Come and give me rest.

On my way

Just bought my ticket to Oklahoma.

I’m kind of in a daze right now, my life is about to really take off.

Your probably wondering why I’m going to Ok, I’m going to live with my grandparents to work with them and travel around OK and AR speaking at churches being an advocate for the things happening in South Africa, to encourage and to raise support for the next mission in my life.

This all starts in June…

I talked to my grandma today, and it brought me to tears. The way people can be so giving without knowing anything else then a newsletter about me. She said there are two women representing me, and what God is doing through me, they travel to different churches and ask for support…FOR ME.

Sometimes I think we forget how much God really does care. Jeremiah 1:9, for I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper and not for despair.

Why is that so hard to grasp sometimes? Why is it so easy for us to jump to the classic line, “no, I got it, I can handle it.” WE CAN’T! hahaha only God can take on the problems we face, and he does it willingly.. Only God can provide in the unthinkable. We can’t, most times we don’t even know what is best for us. We just think we do.

humility, humility, humility. Thanks God for reminding me that its ok to be the least, its ok to accept help, its necessary.

The woman who fears the Lord

I love how God puts topics into our lives over and over again until we start understanding, and not only understanding but APPLYING and LIVING OUT what he has spoken. and this is what he's spoken.

Proverbs 31:10-31

10 An excellent wife who can find?
She is far more precious than jewels.
11 The heart of her husband trusts in her,
and he will have no lack of gain.
12 She does him good, and not harm,
all the days of her life.
13 She seeks wool and flax,
and works with willing hands.
14 She is like the ships of the merchant;
she brings her food from afar.
15 She rises while it is yet night
and provides food for her household
and portions for her maidens.
16 She considers a field and buys it;
with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.
17 She dresses herself with strength
and makes her arms strong.
18 She perceives that her merchandise is profitable.
Her lamp does not go out at night.
19 She puts her hands to the distaff,
and her hands hold the spindle.
20 She opens her hand to the poor
and reaches out her hands to the needy.
21 She is not afraid of snow for her household,
for all her household are clothed in scarlet.
22 She makes bed coverings for herself;
her clothing is fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is known in the gates
when he sits among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them;
she delivers sashes to the merchant.
25 Strength and dignity are her clothing,
and she laughs at the time to come.
26 She opens her mouth with wisdom,
and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
27 She looks well to the ways of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children rise up and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
29 “Many women have done excellently,
but you surpass them all.”
30 Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain,
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
31 Give her of the fruit of her hands,
and let her works praise her in the gates

Not until the day I start working on becoming Mrs right, will my Mr Right come. In order for me to be ready to be in a relationship, a serious relationship with the intent of marriage I first need to become the person I want to find. This comes as a challenge. I tend to settle. I am sick of settling.

{{Jesus give me strength to BECOME a woman who fears you ABOVE ALL ELSE. Let my mind focus on you, because you say that when my eyes are set on you then my path will be made straight. I am done settling for people who are not in your will. I want to be in line with YOU. I want to have less of my emotions and more of your sound mind. I want to be so content in the ways of you, and in your character that I am lost. God I want to be l o s t in you, in your love. I want to be your bride. You have my heart, you have my soul, and you have my mind. Lord I want to know yours.}}

Dance

Can you

              i

                m

                    a

                       g

                          i

                              n

                                  e

                           

                                                               Listen, and  

                                                                                  i

                                                                                     m

                                                                                        a

                                                                                          g

                                                                                             i

                                                                                               n

                                                                                                 e

Let your mind be creative, and put yourself in the scene being painted in this song.

What a b e a u t i f u l picture.

“Dancers who Dance upon injustice” -this line sticks out to me tonight. To me it resembles people so free they can dance, they dance in the middle of injustice because they know and believe the God they serve is greater and larger than the injustice. ahh God is so sweet.

Jesus one day in our lifetime may we experience the picture painted in this song. Let us be the dancers who dance, let us sing with one voice, and feel the mountains tremble. For you are such an awesome God. I pray we will be bold enough to stand in the streets and sing of your greatness.  I pray for the lost to feel you move, for us to feel you move. I thank you for the victory and the sacrifice, I thank you for your never ending grace, what a marvelous thing. We are so so so undeserving. Lord help our actions line up with the words of our mouth.