Mistakes

This whole humbling theme seems to be continuing.
Had a mini break down during deliveries today, I ended up switching around two orders so each person got the other persons food. It stressed me out. I was runnning…well driving like a mad person, but I think thoughts in my head were driving crazyer.


“rachel what were you thinking”

“Rachel you are SO stupid”

“Rachel how could you let this happen.”

“oh my gosh everyone is going to be sooo mad.”

“I’ll just tell my boss i’ll buy the boxes of sandwiches.”

“i hope I dont get fired.”

“Woah A COP, better slow down”

“GAHHH WHY? HOW? I EVEN CHECKED THE BOXES WHEN I GAVE THEM.”

“How could I let that happen?”


As I drove back to the Potbelly store from the 2nd try at getting the food right, I had a revelation. I was praying for my friend and then all of a sudden I broke down in tears and it was like He said, “beloved, YOU are the one who needs me right now, YOU are the one who can’t admit she is not ok.” Then that verse came to my head, Come to me all who are weary and HEAVY LADEN, and I w i l l give you rest.

Through making this one mistake on a delivery I realized how hard it is for me to make mistakes. Then I started thinking deeper and wondered, “why is it so hard for me to admit I did something wrong.” Its because I carry pride, I put this wall up that says, EVERYTHING IS WONDERFUL, I’M PEACHY KEEN (ha sorry one of my co workers always says that.) but in reality I’m not the greatest.  So in that car ride I thanked God for giving me another reminder to get off my stool, and come back down to the bottom. He reminded me that its OK to get help, or to even ask for help.

God I pray that you continue to soften my heart, continue to break down the walls I have built up and let me accept when help comes my way. I want to find all my satisfaction in you and you alone. Come and give me rest.